Why You’re Still Stressed After the Work Is Done (And How to Actually Feel Better)
The Hidden Reason You Can’t Unwind After Work
Still tense after the project is done? Your brain might be over it—but your body probably isn’t. Learn how to complete the stress cycle and actually feel better.
You finally hit “send” on the project. You delivered the report. You showed up for the hard conversation.
But instead of exhaling... your shoulders are still up near your ears.
What gives?
If you’ve ever felt like your body didn’t get the memo that the stressful thing is over—you’re not imagining it. And you’re not alone.
The Problem No One Talks About: Stress That Stays
When the stressful event ends, we expect our stress to end too. But often, that’s not what happens.
That’s because stress isn’t just a thought. It’s a biological cycle that runs through your body.
And many of us are unknowingly stuck in the middle of it.
The “Unfinished Rollercoaster” of Modern Work
Imagine stress like a rollercoaster. It has a beginning (the stressful trigger), a middle (the messy action-taking), and—ideally—an end.
But most of us hop off halfway through.
We tick the to-do list, send the email, get through the pitch, but we never tell our bodies that we’re safe again.
And so they stay on alert. Braced for impact.
Signs You Haven’t Completed the Stress Cycle
Feeling wired even when you’re “done”
Trouble winding down after work
Carrying work tension home to your family
That low-level hum of unease, even on your day off
Sound familiar? That’s your body saying: “We’re not finished yet.”
6 Simple Ways to Complete the Stress Cycle
You don’t need to overhaul your life. You need to close the loop. Here’s how:
Move Your Body
Even a short walk or a good arm shake sends the message: “Crisis over. We survived.”Breathe Like You Mean It
Slow your exhale. Breathe out longer than you breathe in.
It signals safety to your nervous system.Connect
A 20-second hug. A warm compliment. A shared laugh.
Human connection finishes the cycle.Laugh (The Ugly Kind Counts)
Not polite giggles—real, snorty laughter is a stress release valve.Cry
Tears don’t fix the problem. But they finish the emotion.Create Something
Knitting, scribbling, letter-writing (even the kind you never send).
Creativity is how we move the inner stuff out.
This Isn’t Fluff. It’s Biology.
Just because your mind feels better doesn’t mean your body does.
And when we constantly leave stress unfinished, it piles up.
What if we normalised completing the cycle?
What if feeling good after hard work wasn’t a luxury—but a signal of resilience?
Final Thought: Speak Your Body’s Language
You’re not soft. You’re not broken.
You’re smart enough to learn a new language—one your body understands.
And in return?
It’ll speak back in calm, clarity, and strength.
Sounds like joy at work to me.
🔗 Mentioned in This Episode:
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Why Stress Lingers After You Finish Big Projects
[00:00:00] Listener question: Why do I still feel stressed after big projects?
Lucia Knight: This is the Joy At Work podcast, and I'm Lucia Knight. Here's this week's question from a listener.
Listener: I feel like I'm always carrying stress with me even after I've completed big projects or handed in important reports. How can I feel less stressed?
Lucia Knight: Ooh, this is a good question. You know that feeling when you finally hit send on a big report or you've wrapped up a huge project and instead of relief, your body still feels like it's braced for impact. You think I've done the thing, so why do I still feel stressed? You are not alone, and here's what's happening.
[00:00:46] Why removing the stressor doesn’t remove the stress
Lucia Knight: Removing the cause of this stress doesn't automatically remove the stress from your body. Most of us are taught to deal with emotions in our heads. We intellectualize them. We think if we just understand the problem, then either solve it or talk ourselves down. The feeling will vanish so logically that works.
But emotions aren't just logical thoughts in our brain. They live in our bodies.
[00:01:26] The emotional rollercoaster analogy
Lucia Knight: Think of emotions like tunnels with a beginning, a middle, and an end. And the emotions of stress are probably more like a roller coaster, still with a start, a middle, and an end.
But most of us stop halfway through. We encounter a stressful situation at work. An unwanted email, a hard conversation, a potential conflict, or just a simple, tight deadline. That's the start button on the stress rollercoaster. We push on through with logic, we plan it out. We go into action mode. We complete the report.
We send the tricky email work through that hard decision. And to-do list. We do all the things, but we still get stuck at the midpoint of the stress rollercoaster. We rarely actually deliberately finish the rollercoaster ride. We get stuck in a tunnel between the middle and the end. The stressful emotions stay stuck when your body doesn't get the signal that it's safe again.
[00:02:45] Real-world example: Layoffs and lingering stress
Lucia Knight: So what's going on? Let's say you've just made it through a major decision, a stressful rollercoaster. An example might be the decision to make layoffs due to market changes. Lots of logic going on there, but the hard decisions keep coming. Who, when, how? And even when the plan has been set. It has to be implemented so there is stress at every single part of this process, this rollercoaster or multiple rollercoasters for those who are making the decisions and those who are delivering them, and those who are affected by those decisions.
After each of those stressful rollercoaster rides, everyone has to go back and do their real job, switch back into spreadsheet mode or ops mode, or marketing mode, whatever, and we somehow expect that to happen seamlessly in the mind, but in the body. Mm-hmm. It's still in fight, flight, freeze, or fawn modes.
[00:03:57] Your body needs a different language to feel safe
Lucia Knight: You can't think your way out of stress. Your body needs a different language. It needs you to do something to communicate with it. Hey, we made it. We're safe now.
So here's a few quick. Scientifically proven ways to complete the cycle so that you don't carry all the rollercoasters, all the stressful emotions with you every day, all day. And particularly so you don't carry them home with you to gift to your loved ones.
[00:04:38] 6 ways to complete the stress cycle:
Lucia Knight: Number one, move that body. Any physical movement, walking, dancing, shaking out your arms, tensing every muscle, and then relaxing, it helps your body release the stress chemicals. Even a walk around the block can flush your body with safety feelings.
Number two, slow deep breathing. Breathe out slowly, more slowly than you breathe in for about 90 seconds.
That long exhale signals safety. It activates your parasympathetic nervous system. Uh, that's a signal to your body that you are safe enough to rest and digest. No need to keep sprinting. Just 60 seconds of noticing your breath. No effort. Just let it come and go.
Number three, connection. Hug someone you trust for 20 seconds.
Yes, a full 20 seconds. Now that could be tricky in an open plan office, but on the days when you are working from home, snuggle your partner or dog for just 20 seconds and tell them you've just hit send on a big project and you're celebrating with a hug. It literally changes your physiology.
If you can't hug your colleagues for 20 seconds without raising eyebrows, just share a kind moment, a compliment to a new person in the team. A giant smiley, thanks to the barista. Uh, you look great today to anyone. Feeling seen completes the cycle.
Number four, laughter not polite. Laughter, real laughter, the kind that takes over your whole face and makes you ugly snort, treat yourself to five minutes of your favorite comedian on YouTube or that moment in that movie. There's something about Mary. Laughter completes stress cycles like nothing else.
Five. Crying. No crying, never fixes the problem, but it does move your emotion through and literally out of your body.
It concludes the rollercoaster beautifully. I can't watch the end of Pay it Forward with Kevin Spacey or A Monster Calls with Sigourney Weaver without weeping uncontrollably. Let it out and complete that rollercoaster.
Number six, creative expression. Make something anything. Knit hats for post boxes. Doodle a memory. Write a furious letter that you never send.
Creativity is how we get what's inside of us, outside of us. Can I say that again? Creativity is how we get what's inside of us, outside of us. It's a real emotional rollercoaster flattener.
Stress cycles are biological. Just because the project is done doesn't mean your body knows you are safe. Your brain might be calmer, but your body needs help finishing the loop, concluding the rollercoaster.
[00:08:29] Why normalising stress completion isn’t weakness—it's wisdom
Lucia Knight: Why don't we normalize this? You can care deeply, work hard, push through difficult tasks, and take time to complete the stress cycle. Not because you are soft or weak, but because you are smart and strong. You are learning to speak your body's language and it'll speak back to you in health, in calm, in gratitude, in connection, in strength, to keep doing difficult things without breaking. And that sounds like joy at work to me.
