career change 50

6 skills to help future-proof your career (and earn a good living into your 50s and 60s)

In this article, you’ll learn what aptitudes you need to either learn or hone in order to increase your potential to earn a very good living over the next few decades.

By 2030 (I'll be 58yrs old then!) 800 million jobs are expected to be lost due to automation and the robotic workforce, according to a study on the future of work by the Mckinsey Global Institute. The research was performed across 46 countries and 800 occupations.

So what?

We’ve all seen this happen over our working lives in low-wage occupations (annoying automated call centres, smart cleaning systems, advanced analytical tools, humanless order-taking etc) but what about our high-wage occupations?  

To future-proof our careers, we need to specialise in the very special, high-value human talents that are very difficult to automate or replicate by technology.

To future-proof our careers, we need to specialise in the very special, high-value human talents that are very difficult to automate or replicate by technology.

Can CEOs/MDs roles be automated?

Mckinsey Global Institute specifically estimate that 20% of most CEO’s workload could be automated today by adapting current technology and that percentage is only going to increase each year. But, the line in their report that got my brain fizzing was “Capabilities such as creativity and sensing emotions are core to the human experience and are also difficult to automate.”

So, I picked up Dan Pink’s “A Whole New Mind” again, in which he predicts that career success in the future will rely on our right-brain skills (see below) rather than our logical left-brained skills which got us to where we are today.  

Why?

Because right-brain aptitudes are very hard to automate, so these will be the aptitudes that will offer us high-value work in our late stage careers.

The left-brained activities will be automated.

According to Pink, the Top 6 right-brain aptitudes that hold the power to future-proof our careers are:

  1. Empathy

  2. Using stories to persuade and communicate

  3. Big picture thinking

  4. Design

  5. Humour, laughter, game playing

  6. Seeking out and connecting purpose and meaning?

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How many of your daily activities utilise these aptitudes?

If the answer less than four or five, I’d urge you to work out ways to learn these skills, practise them until they become natural enough to build into your daily work.  This new learning, combined with all of your experience to date, has the power to future-proof your earnings for the next couple of decades.

If you’re already using many of them, keep honing them until they become some of your Superpowered offering that lets you stand out from the competitive marketplace, now and in 20 years time.  

Quick and dirty analysis - my former career v my new career

In my 19 year corporate career,  I used only two of these aptitudes daily (EMPATHY and SEEKING OUT PURPOSE & MEANING) so the writing was on the wall.

I’ve analysed that I'm now using five out of these six right-brain aptitudes in my daily work.  That said, many of them are newer skills that I’m constantly learning more about by reading books, watching Youtube, consuming Ted Talks and generally experimenting with them in my daily work and life.   

Today, (oddly perhaps?) the PLAY element of work is the trickiest one for me to build into my work. Thankfully, my two daughters are helping me out with that one! I’m also in the process of learning more about DESIGN which interests me but I feel way behind the curve having had very little exposure in my life so far.

Should you worry?

There is no need to be in any way worried about the next decades of your career - if the work that you love AND your Superpowers include skills that computers find hard to perform. But even if they don’t, there’s time to learn them and layer them into your future work.

Impacts of right-brained aptitudes in interviews for left-brained roles

In my old world of head-hunting, my specialism could have been described as seeking out the perfect left-brained Finance Director to help companies grow financially.

I saw the left-brained activity forming the basics of a role profile. But, I found those who were able to display high-performance in right-brained aptitudes in interviews were much more successful.  

Success came more often to:

  • Those who could empathise with the specific people problems within the business;

  • Those who could convince the CEO/MD/HRD of their personal fit by telling impactful head and heart stories in a way that fit with the company culture;

  • Those who demonstrated their bigger picture vision of finance and connected it to the design of their roles (and their teams’ roles) to import greater meaning into the purpose of their finance team.

  • Those who appeared to be more fun to work with!

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Past, present and future for executive roles

In the past, left-brained skills were base level requirements for many senior roles. Right-brained aptitudes were a differentiator.

Currently, value is placed on the combination of left-brained and right-brained aptitudes.

In the future, right-brained aptitudes will be base level requirements.

To earn a good living well into our 50s and 60s, we need to have all six of these skills in our experience tool-kit and have honed them into our Superpowers.

I bet my entire career on it!

If you’d like some help with over-hauling your career, figuring out your Superpowers and getting a plan in place, take a look at a couple of ways I can help you.






Attitude to money impacts career freedom. A true story and lessons learned.

Our attitude to money and financial considerations have a huge influence on our ability to change career or to design our work differently to how we've designed it in the past.

In this guest article by the lovely Sue Marshall, she tells her story of career change with a focus on how her attitude to money had the ability to both keep her stuck and set her free.

Sue Marshall - a career re-design story with a focus on attitude to money.

Sue Marshall - a career re-design story with a focus on attitude to money.

My historical attitude to money

I’ve never really been focused on making money. It just wasn’t that interesting to me.

I’ve always been motivated by working with people that inspire me and doing a job that excites and challenges me.

I felt that I was incredibly lucky to be able to get paid for working incredibly hard, doing work I enjoy.   

That’s not to say I’m financially unaware – I’ve always maintained a tight grip on household expenses to ensure that the basics are covered. But let’s just say I just didn’t have a very extensive financial vision!  

I knew I wanted to be mortgage free by 50 but that was about it.

Neither my husband nor I come from money, so – once we’d covered the bases, we were pretty blasé about spending.

We both had final salary pension schemes and a ‘survival’ fund of a year or so, so we felt quite virtuous.

Until, that is, things changed. The gap from the point our funds ran out and normal retirement date became gradually more terrifying.  

Gap jump.jpg

Mind the Gap…

When you know something’s not quite right you can bury your head in the sand, or you can make something different happen.

I was worn out.

All that working incredibly hard had taken its toll.

So, I became an ostrich. I continued to work stupidly hard because I had no ‘off switch’ – but my heart was no longer in it.

On the odd occasion I did lift my head and ask myself, ‘What on earth are you doing?’ I remembered The Gap, thought: ‘you’ve just got to keep on going!’ and carried on.   

The Fear

I’ve never felt fear like it.

It was paralysing.

I just kept telling myself to set it aside and keep on powering through. I knew I was hurting myself but I couldn’t stop.

The Moment of Clarity

Clarity rear view mirror.jpg

After a very busy week, I went to see my personal trainer full of aches and pains to see if she could help me loosen up. She sent me to see my doctor.

After a lengthy series of blood tests, examinations and scans I was diagnosed with stress, anxiety and appendicitis.  

An appendectomy followed.

As I was coming around, I remember being delighted that I didn’t have to do anything remotely useful for weeks: that was so not me!

It was right then that I realised something had to give.

Reaching out when opportunity comes knocking

My lucky star hadn’t completely deserted me: whilst I was convalescing, I received an offer to cash in my final salary pension scheme.

A friend recommended a financial advisor who helped me work through that idea and I went ahead: yes, I would lose money on the deal, but it would allow us flexibility over the next 10 years or so.

It probably took a good five months or so to really understand our financial position and our options – my financial advisor became my best friend! If you don’t have one, I suggest you find one, or be prepared to learn about pensions, tax, investments….

Knowledge was the key to reducing my fear

Looking back, I can see that the fact that I didn’t understand our financial position at all was keeping me in that state of fear.

When I learned that I could move my final salary pension to somewhere more flexible...the fear reduced enough to allow me to start to really track our spending!  

Knowledge about career financials

What I discovered

I discovered that WE COULD MANAGE!

Yes, it was a big shock to understand how much we spent on birthdays, Christmas, food and drink. Also, the ‘hidden’ costs of kids who we thought had left home!  

But the biggest discovery was that we could balance things.

And we also have a financial model we can play tunes on:

  • What if the stock market tanks?

  • How much CAN we spend?

  • What if my husband retires this year, next year, at 65?

  • Can we survive if my business makes a loss this year, next year?

  • When will the money run out if we spend x, y or z annually?

We now have a lovely warm feeling about every penny that we bring in because we can now see how it will help us live a little differently.

What I learned that may be useful for others in similar situations

  • Although it’s terrifying at the beginning, becoming more aware of financial patterns, spending and the potential impact of decisions actually reduces the fear

  • Understanding your run-rate/cash-burn is super important so you know how long your savings and investments will last and how/when/if you can access your pension.

  • Go looking for the gaps: the more uncomfortable, the more important it will be for you to address them.

  • For those with partners: initiating dialogues with your other half is important! This one is a bit embarrassing: my grip on the family finances was pretty well total, so the fear was all mine as well. The knowledge and the fear are now shared and everything is so much easier now we make joint decisions.

  • We’ve been transparent throughout with our kids. They have both benefited from the experience – our daughter (25) works, lives and SAVES in London and our son (22) is now fully accountable for his finances in his final year at Uni. (I can’t tell you what a relief that is!)

What I know for sure:

  • Knowledge about our finances gave me my power back.  It allowed me to understand that we have many more viable options than I thought we did. My husband and I have conversations with a deeper understanding of our financial position.  For instance, if one of us wants to retire sooner than we had planned we can talk through the impact and make decisions together. We now know how different our lives could look under a variety of circumstances.

  • We now collaborate in financial decisions more than ever and we’ve happily curtailed our spending in all sorts of ways.  We even tell one another before we buy clothes now! Our decisions are linked in a way that they haven’t been in the past.

Off button.jpg

Changes in me

  • Whilst I wouldn’t wish that period of my life on anybody, in many ways it’s been a gift.  I’m back to being me – and I look after myself these days: I haven’t got to please people or dilute myself to fit in. Financial knowledge has been key to reducing my fear, allowing me to be objective and helping me make decisions that ultimately freed me.

  • I’ve also changed my money mindset: I value it more and have respect for the opportunities it can open up. I’m more grateful for the things I have, and my ability to pause to consider what I really want has increased.  

  • I’m still working on the ‘off switch’ but I’m more able to stop and smell the roses and appreciate things like a walk in the woods rather than delivering to deadlines which are self-imposed these days.

But most importantly, I’m back doing work that I love in a way that feels like me!














This illness might be keeping you stuck (even if you're trying hard to make changes)

Yesterday, I met up with a friend who was annoyed to be attending a party on Saturday night.  When questioned, she simply didn’t want to go. “Simple” I said, “Don’t go!”

Not that simple. She feels strongly that she should attend the party, even though she’d prefer to spend time relaxing with her husband (who’s been travelling all week) as she’s exhausted from her own tough week at work. It was really worrying her. I struggled to empathise – which is not like me.

But, you see, I’d already battled with my own case of Shoulditis a few years ago and came out the other side.  I’d almost forgotten what it felt like.

Shoulditis: An illness where the individual feels compelled to do things that they don’t want to, often based on someone else’s recommendation.

You know how it goes:

  • I should get started on the 5:2 diet soon.

  • I should do a Marie Kondo style clear-out of the garage.

  • I should get up a 5am every day to meditate.

Yeh Yeh Yeh! It’s easy to ignore some shoulds.

Shoulditis - an illness where the individual feels compelled to do something they don’t want to - can impact both life and work satisfaction.

Shoulditis - an illness where the individual feels compelled to do something they don’t want to - can impact both life and work satisfaction.

It can also impact work and your career.

Career Shoulditis: An illness where the individual feels compelled to stay in a job/company/industry/career that they don’t want to, often based on someone else’s recommendation.

If you know someone who is not enjoying their work but appears to be burying their head in the sand, they might be suffering from a serious case of Career Shoulditis

Common quotes from Career Shoulditis sufferers:

They might be saying any of the following in their heads, and if you know them well (or throw enough alcohol down their throats), they may repeat them aloud:

  • I should stay as an accountant/doctor/lawyer because my parents were accountants/doctors/lawyers and it’s what they always wanted for me

  • I should stay as an accountant/doctor/lawyer because I’ve invested so much to get here (If this resonates, read my article on ignoring sunk costs)

  • I should stay because the market is tough and it’ll be hard to get another job that pays this much

  • I should stay until X happens, then I’ll think about what to do

  • I should stay - what would everyone think if I quit?

  • I should stay until I have an idea about my future and can plan it out to perfection

  • I should stay for as long as I can, even though I know the time is coming

  • I should stay because there’s too much going on in the rest of my life and at least its stable

  • I should stay until I get made redundant, then I’ll decide what to do

  • I should stay because I might never find another job

  • I should stay - if I don’t everyone will think I’m having a mid-life crisis

Since my own battle with career shoulditis, I’ve taken to saying “I don’t want to” a great deal especially when talking about my business and I see people actually physically recoiling as if I am behaving like a spoilt child!  

When I say out loud “I don’t want to do X”, people physically recoil as if I’m behaving like a spoilt child.

When I say out loud “I don’t want to do X”, people physically recoil as if I’m behaving like a spoilt child.

That phrase “I don’t want to do X” is considered culturally aggressive (in UK) so I find myself softening it but the result is the same.

I’ve chosen to have my own business because there are 1000s of things that I want to do but I can’t do them all so I need to make choices…to make informed decisions…not decisions based on someone else’s should.

I seek out and listen to advice from all sorts of people who are a bit further ahead of me in their business journey.  I hear such radical advice that it could rock my world if I thought I should do it all.  

Things I don’t want to do but others think I should do to grow my business:

(Let it be said, I reserve the right to change my mind with further research or compelling evidence.)

  • I should be politically correct in business

Should I?

I don’t want to tow the corporate line if the corporate line is a lie.   Big companies can say that their recruitment and promotional tactics are not ageist.  

I can now freely say things like “If you are in your 50s and still working for a big corporate – start planning your exit because your company is doing just that” as in my experience it’s true.  One of my most read articles was called 50-year old corporate toast!

The (often politically incorrect) truth is helpful.

  • I should accept every new client request so that I can make more money.

Should I?

I don’t want to work with everyone! I want to work with new clients if I feel they are prepared to commit the time, effort and energy it takes to think through their career from a completely different angle and make the required changes to design more satisfying work.

That’s why I created my free half hour telephone call where potential clients and I ask each other questions to understand if we have the same goals and expectations.

If we are not right for each other, I might know someone who is a better fit for them and they might know someone who is a better fit for me.  

  • I should invest in branding consultants, logo designers, social media teams, content writers, PR businesses, impressive offices etc to make me look uber successful.

Should I?

How would someone else know my personal definition of success?

If I had done these in the beginning, my business would have died within months and I’d have crumpled under the pressure of NEEDING to make a fortune just to cover monthly costs. I would have lost my freedom to work in a way that works for me. 

As it stands, I have a self-designed logo, do all my own social media marketing, write every word that I publish (including self-crafted spelling mistakes!), designed my own website and update it weekly to keep it fresh.  I work from my home office and very nice public locations. And I talk to journalists directly.

All wrong by someone else’s standards.

I love the freedom and control to mess up or be successful and to have them both be my fault.

  • I should pay fortunes for Facebook/Instagram ads, do live videos daily, fill my website with paid advertisements and pop-ups and design on-line webinars to grow my business.

Should I?

Every single one of these growth strategies would crush my enjoyment of creating and designing a business that works for me and gets me bounding out of bed each morning.  

I have decided upon a growth strategy that may be slightly slower but fits my personality, my superpowers, my deep interests in psychology and helping others to stop wasting time doing work that doesn’t make them happy.    

People tell me regularly that I should do things that everyone else is doing and that I shouldn’t be a “lone wolf”.

People tell me regularly that I should do things that everyone else is doing and that I shouldn’t be a “lone wolf”.

  • I should not be a “lone wolf”

Shouldn’t I?

One of the elements of having my own business which was so attractive is exactly the point that I would like to be what was called in my previous corporate career a “lone wolf”.  

When I was leading teams, each of them had at least one “lone wolf” who simply wasn’t a team player and it took a little extra management to get the most out of them.  In contrast, I’ve been a team player all my life, loved team sports, enjoyed pulling teams together towards a joint goal and contributing to team success.

Scary as it is, I have chosen to be “a lone wolf”.  This business will live or die based upon my efforts alone.  So, I want to make sure that when I make decisions to do or not to do something that it comes from me not someone else’s should.

  • My business philosophy should be “The more clients the merrier”

Should it?

When I was setting up my business, I chose not to sell e-cigarettes or sugar water because I want to sell stuff that I believe in.  I chose to sell something that can add to people’s lives but isn’t easy to sell in volume because of time, effort, cost and psychological change processes involved.

I want enough clients to sustain me and my family but I want choice on how and when to work with them.

Revenue is not my only goal.  

Even though my business has only been in existence for just over 2 years and it takes between 2 weeks and 6 months to go through my programmes, just under half of my business has come from personal recommendations.

I cannot tell you what a red letter day it is when I get an email from a potential client who has been recommended to me by another client.  Even though these new clients are “stuck” in their midlife careers in very different ways, they all arrive knowing what to expect with enough energy to contribute to the thinking and change processes.

So what impact could Shoulditis have on your career?

If we let it get under our skins and impact our decision-making, shoulditis can be a hellish illness that keeps us doing stuff that we don’t want to do. 

  • It can make us go to parties when we’d prefer to be snuggled up at home with our partner catching up on a gripping Netflix series over a bottle of wine and a Deliveroo.  

  • Shoulditis can also keep us stuck in jobs, companies or careers that simply don’t fit us any more. It can suffocate our future career possibilities and kill our potential to do work that really matters...to us!

What could you do instead?

Instead of considering “What should I do?”, maybe ask yourself “what do I really want to do?”

Now there’s a question...

Other articles you might like:








 

 

Spending more money on your kids' activities than your future career?

Spending on kids’ activities is grand…but are you prioritising their ball-kicking over your future career?

Spending on kids’ activities is grand…but are you prioritising their ball-kicking over your future career?

4 years ago, I realised that while we were spending around £200 each month on my daughters’ swimming, netball and gymnastics classes, I was spending £0 on my future career.

We were paying a nanny to take the girls to their weekday lessons.  For the weekend classes, my husband and I would spend a couple of hours escorting them to their lessons where they learned how to do a decent frog kick, perfect a roly poly and shoot a hoop.

Adoring mum as I am, I had a fairly good idea that neither of my daughters were headed towards the Olympic circuit.   But I was clear that I didn’t want to be doing what I was doing for the next 20 years.

When I noted down what was happening, it was the slap in the face I needed.  

The notes from my wake-up call that promoted a re-think of my career strategy….from non-existent!

The notes from my wake-up call that promoted a re-think of my career strategy….from non-existent!

The slap in the face I needed.

It dawned on me that I hadn’t invested a penny of my own money nor a moment of my precious time improving my chances of doing more fulfilling work in my future.  

Sure, I was attending work events and doing training courses paid for by my company (which of course were designed to make me better at my current job).  But for the previous 3 years, I hadn’t prioritised my future career AT ALL!

When I was honest about it, my long-term future career hadn’t even made it onto my to-do list FOR YEARS. 

Why the hell not?

1.       I was flat-out making my then career-family combo work (at least to a level where I was neither afraid for my job nor breaking as a human. For the record, I had returned to work after my first daughter mid 2008 when all hell was breaking loose in the financial world).

2.       I didn’t know what I might like to do in my future work.

3.       I didn’t know what I might like to do in my future work.

So…I admitted aloud what I did know for sure:

I couldn’t admit this out loud and do nothing about it.

I couldn’t admit this out loud and do nothing about it.

And something changed.

A bit of common sense leaked in, as my Dad might say. 

I sensed that I’d be in the same spot, in the same industry, possibly in the same company, in five years, if I didn’t do something.  

Oddly, I’d begun to sense that the silent but deadly 50-year-old corporate toast phenomena would be rearing its ugly head sooner rather than later.

Little by little

I began to invest a little time and a small amount of cash into learning new things.  Why?

  • To get my brain used to learning new stuff because I figured that would be key to my transformation. If you always do what you’ve always done…

  • To give me hope, through action, that I wasn’t going to be doing the same thing forever.

  • To give me, however small, a sense of control over my future.

It's never been easier or cheaper to learn

Here are some examples, many of them free, that I played around with:

·         Duolingo – Fantastic free app for learning another language from scratch or polishing existing knowledge. (Brilliant for kids as well)

·         Khan Academy – Fairly academic on-line courses on everything from programming to engineering and beyond.

·         Udemy – Unbelievable subject diversity - Speed reading, cartooning, digital painting, social media marketing, photography etc.

·         YouTube – all major players in every field have a YouTube presence.  Try their free stuff first before diving in.

·         Podcasts – like YouTube, every man and his dog in every field has a podcast or interviews on podcasts.  There is so much opportunity to spend your commute learning about something that interests you. Listen while you are doing mundane tasks. If I wasn’t doing what I am doing, I would just walk in mountains listening to weird and wonderful podcasts every minute of every day.

Understanding what you don’t know, but need to

Over time, I started to get a sense of where my interests lay. Even though I wasn’t quite sure where I’d end up, I made the decision that I would be doing something for myself.  

That one decision meant that I could get more specific about what I needed to know and began investing in me. Not bags of cash but more than zero.  

Here’s a copy of my starting list:

·         Public speaking,

·         Work psychology,

·         iPhone photography,

·         Psychology of happiness,

·         Article writing,

·         Blogging,

·         Social media marketing,

·         Running a business,

·         PR,

·         Accounting in a one-woman business,

·         Branding,

·         Story-telling,

·         Advertising,

·         Website designing

·         Book publishing,

·         Design,

·         Agile business,

·         Audience definition,

·         Pricing,

·         Meditation,

·         Mindfulness,

·         Life hacks.

If you are smart…

Do this while you’re getting paid a decent salary. 

Use at least one of your commutes each day to do something future-focussed that interests you. Even 30mins a day, during your working weeks, adds up to more than 100 hours a year. Imagine where you could be and what you could know in 100 hours!

If you are to do anything different, you are going to need to exercise your brain – start before you need to.  

You never know where you might end up!


More articles on prioritising your career

Where to start thinking about your career - the first 10 steps

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Common triggers for mid-lifers to change careers



 

 

Fired post 50? Will you ever earn the same salary package again?

If you lose your job post 50, expect slim pickings and slimmer pay packets

I’m a strong advocate for professionals in their 40s and 50s designing their work in a particular way to increase their personal satisfaction and fulfilment. 

But whether you are currently doing deeply fulfilling work or not, I bet you have seen colleagues of a similar age be “disappeared” from your business over the last year.   By “disappeared” I mean it wasn’t their choice to leave.  

Post 50s who are fired, sacked or made redundant - what’s the financial impact?

Post 50s who are fired, sacked or made redundant - what’s the financial impact?

In corporates, it’s usually done quickly and quietly so that the troops are not too scared. But it’s also usually done loudly enough so that everyone feels just a smidge of fear.

Every time this happened to someone in my company, it was hard not to wonder if, or rather when, it might be my turn to get (whisper) fired?  Or (another whisper) sacked?  Or made redundant (no shame here as redundancy is almost a sure bet for those in the 50+ age range, if they are not fired or sacked).  

So, what’s the financial prognosis for your career if you lose your job post 50? 

According to some new US research, I’m afraid it’s not rosy.

(Whilst the research is purely US-centric, it has relevance for most western countries.)

If you are over the age of 50, this new piece of analysis suggests that after you leave a company, you may never earn the same salary again.   The analysis was based on *US raw social security data and the National Institute Health and Retirement study which involved over 20,000 people who had been in full-time employment for at least 5 years within one company when the study commenced and followed them over a many years.

The analysis concluded that when post-50 year olds exit a company, whether under circumstances of their choosing or not, their next roles very often involved lower levels of expertise alongside a significant drop in salary and benefits packages.  

What to do?

We could take a big picture view and rise up against age discrimination in the courts, in our companies and in our lives.  We could cling on for dear life, with our fingers crossed, hoping that we can buck the international trend.

Alternatively, and in my opinion more impactfully, we could take a smaller picture, personalised view and make sure that we have an alternative plan - a Plan B - before we need it. 

As the corporate career tunnel narrows, is it time you began to consciously design your Plan B?

As the corporate career tunnel narrows, is it time you began to consciously design your Plan B?

In our 40s and 50s, while we are enjoying the corporate salary and package, we need to take some time to personalise our career plan. To design one that will last for much longer than our company decides to employ us.  One that will offer us some light at the end of our tunnel of narrowing career options within corporates.

If we focus as early as we can on designing this very personal plan, twisting and turning it, trialling it and then analysing the results from our experiments, we can refine it to the point where it evolves into our PLAN A – when the time is right for us.

Next steps

If you like the sound of that but aren’t sure how to go about it, why not download my Where to Start guide for the first 10 steps to designing work that might fit you – for a very long time. It’s not a magic bullet but it covers the initial practical steps that you need to have covered, before you can embark on creating your exciting Plan B.

Other related articles:

50 year old corporate toast

How to start creating your Plan B

The Future of work if you are in your 40s and 50s

*Data mentioned here was sourced from the US Social Security Administration and National Institute on Aging’s joint longitudinal Health & Retirement Study via an analysis by joint Urban Institute-ProPublica project.





THE ONLY THING career changers in their 40 or 50s want

In a recent article, you saw the second most popular trigger for successful career change at our age.  Now, let’s explore the most popular trigger for career change.

But before we do, did you do the task at the end of the last article?  I suggested you write down the 3 things that you want less of in your future work

Go on, do it now on a piece of paper…we’ll wait for you…

I would be surprised if you found the exercise difficult.   Figuring out what the problems are takes no time.  If you are reading this, you may have been thinking about what you don’t want in your work for some time?

But somehow, very little has changed?

One major cause for that is that by continuing to focus on “the problem of work” you are allowing your brain to remain problem-focused. 

How the brain keeps you stuck

Your brain only does what it thinks you want it to do.  It is not aware that you are open to seeking out a range of possible solutions to your problem when you spend lots of time thinking and talking about the problem of work.  So, it thinks it is helping you by keeping the problem of work front and centre.  Resulting in you staying exactly where you are. 

In your brain, focussing on the problem is like telling yourself that you want to lose weight.  That you want to get rid of those flabby bingo wings or the belly that has more jelly than it used to.   Frankly, that sort of thinking keeps you stuck in the very place that you want to leave!

How to get your brain on-side

You need your brain in solution-focussed mode instead.

What I noticed during my interviews with over 70 successful career changers (so far) is that only when they got really clear on what they wanted instead of their current situation did they get their brains into the right place to be open enough to seek out some alternative solutions. 

They got their brains solutions-focussed rather than problem-focussed.  That seemingly minor shift had a major impact.  

What all successful career changers in their 40s, 50, 60s seem to crave

In short, every single one of these successful mid-life career changers wanted the same thing.  Actually, they didn’t just want it – they craved it. 

THEY ALL CRAVED “MORE”.   

They each had their own very personal type of “more” but broadly, according to my research, their “MORE” fell into the following 4 categories:

Is it time to get really clear on what your very personal ideas about your “More” look like?

Here are some direct quotes from career changers that give an indication of what they wanted in their future work. 

Perhaps some resonate with you?    

MORE…Learning

“I realised I hadn’t learned anything new for such a long time and somehow that somehow became very important.” (Lindsay Cornelissen, Banking industry to wine entrepreneur)

“I woke up to realise that I wanted to learn more. Not more to make me better at my job – more of something totally and utterly different that would allow me to have a bigger impact on the world.”  (Me! Corporate head-hunter to mid-life career change coach)

“I’m happy where I am – for now.  But I worry that I am not challenging myself, just coasting. I worry that I am de-skilling.  I feel valued for the job I do but I’ve done it well and they won’t need me at some point.  I want a great plan to be read to roll out when the time is right. (Client, Legal, 50s)

“I heard this voice telling me to find something different but I had invested so much time and life energy in this industry I wasn’t sure.  But in the end, I knew needed to do something different.” (Elizabeth Draper, Film industry executive to gluten-free baker)

 MORE…Time with loved ones

“I got frustrated having to ask permission to have a half-day off to watch kids school plays or attend parent meetings.  I just couldn’t hack the five weeks of freedom, time off for good behaviour.  I wanted more freedom.” (David James, Senior finance executive to flexible contractor)

I’d fallen out of love with sales a few years ago around the time when I filed for divorce.  I know that any day I spend with my children is infinitely more enjoyable than any day I spent working in my sales job.  So I decided to re-train to make sure I can spend more time with them.   (Gareth Jenkins, Sales now re-training as a self-employed electrician)

For so many years I left before the kids went to school and I’d return when they were in bed.  Or I would travel the world for 2 weeks at a time.  A major difference is that I see my kids more.  I’m just not grumpy at the weekend anymore.  (Andy Eaton, International FD to owning his own accounting firm)

I just couldn’t accept the long-haul travel and didn’t want to miss out on weekends with the family. (Sally Smy, International buyer to personal stylist)

“I spent much of the school summer holidays this year with my 13-year old daughter diving, paddle boarding, surfing.” (Stephen Wright, Architect's Technician to flexible working with an incredible coastal lifestyle.)

MORE…Appreciation

After 20 years of fee earning, I still loved helping people but realised I wanted to help more on the emotional side.  (Client, Law, 50s)

“I felt under-valued, as if the wind had been taken out of my sails. I felt that my decision to work part-time since the arrival of my first child had been taken advantage of.” (Louise Brogan, NHS IT Manager to Social Media Entrepreneur)

“I feel that no one is looking out for me anymore.  As I’ve become more senior, my sponsors have moved on.  I don’t feel as valuable to the company.” (Client, FMCG, 40s)

“After 20 years of working my socks off for the benefit of others, I reflected and realised that I was being neither valued nor appreciated. (Duncan Haddrell, Senior finance career to distribution business owner)

“I felt like a commodity in the end.” (Kelly-Ann Grimes Hospitality IT COO to owner of franchise PA business.)

“I had had enough.  I didn’t feel at all respected.  I asked myself the question - If I die tomorrow would I die happy?  No, not while I was in my old role.  If you asked me that question today, I would say yes because I would die feeling truer to myself, feeling valued and definitely feeling respected.” (Jennifer Corcoran, Executive PA to Social Media Trainer)

MORE…fulfilling work

I wanted to do wonderful creative things like I used to.  I wanted to be my own person again.” (Client, Media, 50s)

“I felt creatively stifled as I no longer had a real say in campaign development.” (Charlotte Moore, Social Media Editor to Foodie PR Specialist)

“As a woman in senior leadership I felt shrunk-to-fit, forced to specialise in something that I didn’t love and being edged out of a successful, cut-throat world of advertising.  (Client, Media, 50s)

“I’d grown tired of trying to motivate people to change when they didn’t want to.  I realised later in life, after running lots of change projects, that I am not all that good with people.  I needed to become a specialist.  (Client, 50s, Technology)

Try this

career change 40+

Take a piece of paper and write down a long list of all things that you’d like more of in your future work and all the things that you would have more of if you did more fulfilling, satisfying work every day.

Take a photo of this list, save it as your screen saver or print it out and put it in in your coat pocket, your purse or wallet or laptop case.  Talk about it with friends and family over the next few weeks. If you read it a couple of times every day for the next week or so I promise you a tiny little bit of magic will happen in your brain…Dots will begin to connect.

I’d love to know if you hit upon any ideas.

Join my private community of successful professionals who are interested in designing more joy into their career and tell me what you came up with.  I return every email personally and can’t wait to hear how this mini-experiment goes for you.

Click the image to receive twice monthly articles, strategies and stories to inspire your career change.

Click the image to receive twice monthly articles, strategies and stories to inspire your career change.

I want more

Second most common trigger for career change in 40s, 50s or 60s.

Wanting career change is much like wanting to lose weight. Just having a desire to weigh less rarely motivates anyone into a radical transformation. Whereas being very clear about the very specific elements of body shape or areas of fitness that you are unhappy with focuses the mind on change.

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Many people consider career change (and weight loss!) for a very long time without much change occurring.  Being crystal clear on the specifics that you don’t want in your future career clears the mind to focus on the next step in any career change.

In my ongoing change interviews with professionals in their 40s, 50s and 60s, I’ve noticed two broad triggers for career change.   

In this article, I will focus on the second most common trigger for career change in your 40s, 50s or 60s… 

…A DESIRE FOR LESS of the nonsense that makes their work less fulfilling, less satisfying and definitely less fun than it could be.    

Acknowledging what you don’t want in your future work appears to be a crucial starting point for change.  Equivalent to clearing the fridge and pantry of the sugary treats that could rail road a future weight loss programme.

From my successful career change interview series, I’ve discovered that there are 3 broad categories of LESS that form trigger for change.

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Here are some quotes from professionals in their 40s or 50s who decided what it was that they had had enough of before then moving onto the next stages in designing their new work.

Do any resonate with you?

  1. Exhaustion

“I realised I’d been spending two hours each day commuting, the equivalent of 2 full working days, to do a five-day week, working 40-50 hours a week.” (Client, Media, 40s.)

I’m physically and mentally burned out. I’m worried that I’m not performing at my best and that it might start to show.”  (Client, Law, 50s)

“I had had enough of the dread, of having to look forward every year to the business struggle, the redundancies and the disruption.   Enough of 10-12-hour days travelling across London. Being exhausted at the weekends.  I thought there’s got to be more to life than this.”  (Denyse Whillier - Chief Executive - to Executive Coach and Business Scale expert)

“I hit my mid-40s and began to wonder how I wanted to spend my remaining working career.   I was fed up working 60-hour weeks for someone else, always being on call.  I felt like a commodity in the end. (Kelly-Ann Grimes – Hospitality IT C00 to PA Franchise owner)

I’d burned out doing work that didn’t suit me but my drive and hard-working personality had kept me going.  I’d never considered any other career other than this, ever.  But I made the decision that when I would go back to work, if I could go back to work, I would definitely not be a solicitor.”  (Client, Legal. 40s)

2. Stress

“I was on blood pressure tablets and heart strengthening drugs and was still dealing with the death of my father the previous year.  Work stress was the least of my worries but there came a point when I recognised that it was at the core of my worries.” (Client, Retail, 40s)

My Sunday night blues started at 6am on Sunday morning.  I hated going on relaxing holidays because I couldn’t relax and my work stress was putting a strain on my lovely relationship.”   (Client, FMCG, 40s)

“A whole swathe of managers was offered the opportunity to stick around for heart attacks and early deaths.  Most of us had signed the papers before they hit the desks!” (Ges Ray, former banker now Public Speaking entrepreneur)

“I’d been carrying around my resignation letter for months but couldn’t make myself hand it in.  I couldn’t figure out why not. (Client, Technology, 40s)

3. Work that doesn’t fit anymore

“As a senior female, I felt shrunk to fit, forced to specialise in something that I didn’t love and being edged out of a successful, cut-throat world of advertising.  (Client, Media, 50s)

“I’d grown tired of trying to motivate people to change when they didn’t want to.”  (Client, Financial Services, 50s)

“For so many years I left before the kids went to school and I’d return when they were in bed.  Or I would travel the world for 2 weeks at a time.” (Andy Eaton, International Finance Director to owner of accounting firm)

One new leader proved to have a cataclysmic effect on my enjoyment of work.” (Ben Fielding - Technology career to joint-owner in a technology firm)

“I’d been carrying around my resignation letter for months but couldn’t make myself hand it in.  I can’t figure out why not. (Client, Technology, 40s)

I felt like I was moving further and further away from work that I really enjoyed. (Lindsay Cornelissen – Banking industry leader to wine entrepreneur)

“Even though I had a great career and a six-figure salary, I was expected to keep moving up in a career I had fallen into.  I just didn’t want to go any higher.  The roles weren’t attractive to me. (Julia Duncan, Technology career to Photographer)

Then I started to realise that the day job was just not me anymore.  I’d always been fairly good at getting job offers but I had just stopped connecting with MDs in my late 40s.  I was maybe too expensive, too grumpy, too old or simply too opinionated.  They just wanted me to do the job the way that they wanted it done.” (Andy Eaton - International Finance Director to own accounting firm)

“I’d fallen out of love with sales a few years ago around the time when I filed for divorce.” (Client, Recruitment, 40s)

“I realised then that I had had enough of this culture of profit over people.” (Jennifer Corcoran - Executive Assistant to Social Media Trainer for Entrepreneurs)

Clarifying what you will not accept in your future work is a very good place to begin a career overhaul.

career change try this

ACTION: Grab a pen and a post-it note. Write down the top three things that you want less of in your future work.  It should feel cathartic and you may even feel lighter having written it down.

Pop it in your bag and chat through it when you get home tonight. Then watch out for the next article on the Number 1 trigger for career change at our age.

In the meantime, if you’d like to hear more about my own personal triggers for change, have a look at this video. You’ll get access to my free downloadable “Where to Start” guide to career change at the end.

How to stay in a job you don't like...FOREVER! And the exact steps to do the opposite.

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I’d bet money that you know someone who appears “successful” to the external world but internally they dread Monday mornings, feel unfulfilled while at work and head home most days feeling dissatisfied with their contribution to the world.  

But what should they do? Leap into something else or just point their head down and bum up until they have amassed enough of a retirement fund to go and do something more fun instead - as the 80s kids TV programme suggested. 

What it feels like to be in a job that you hate

Someone I know well wrote an article for me explaining in perfect detail how a job that he used to love turned into a job that had begun to erode his motivation, his energy, his family life and ultimately his health.  Read his anonymous story here.  It certainly packs an anonymous punch.

Not all situations are as drastic as the one above but without action low level unenjoyable work can develop into something more serious.  Check out the stories below of mid-life career changers who took action - but not a moment too late:  

·         Charlotte Moore couldn’t imagine continuing in her corporate Social Media Editing role at Tesco after the creative elements were outsourced to an agency.   She wasn’t offered redundancy even though she had all fingers and toes crossed for that outcome following a restructure.  Read what Charlotte did after hearing the news. 

·         Ben Fielding got stuck with a new boss who had “a cataclysmic impact” on his love of his work.  He took charge of his future in an interesting way which gave him focus, a very specific goal and breathing space whilst still paying the mortgage.  Read Ben’s story here. 

·         Andy Eaton realised two things which prompted his departure from a 20+year career.  He realised that over the previous decade he'd spent 50% of his time away from his family on work trips and that the role of Finance Director had morphed into something he didn’t want to be anymore.  Read how logical and creative thinking combined to lead him to his new career. 

From my coaching experience,  mid-professional career changes are always prompted by a specific trigger experience that prompts deep reflection.  In some people, this deep reflection converts to a need for action. 

Note: this need for action is what differentiates actual career changers from people who would "like to do something about their career"  These people haven’t quite reached a tipping point from which action is required.  They are likely to stay where they are until things get bad enough or until they see a perfect idea that excites them.  (Read this article to see if you've reached your career tipping point yet)

Top 10 triggers for “taking action” towards a mid-profession career change.   

  • A big birthday – either on approach or a year or two afterwards
  • Personal illness
  • Medically-diagnosed (as opposed to self-diagnosed) work-related stress
  • Elderly parental illness or the death of a parent
  • Divorce
  • Redundancy
  • Unplanned exit from a long-term company/role
  • Major changes at home e.g. kids moving to big school or university
  • First ever lower than expected performance appraisal
  • A crappy bonus
  • A missed promotion

For the people I coach, all these experiences have prompted a re-adjustment of their expectations from work.   They express a desire to have "more" of something at work (often satisfaction, fulfilment or fun) and less of something else (the crap bits of working life).

The trigger can initiate a different thought process – if this thought process doesn’t cause some action, the circular thought process can sometimes lead to the ever-decreasing circles of a mid-life career crisis.   But, if this thought process is actioned, attached to a structured method and allowed enough time it will result in a clarity of vision for the remainder of a career. 

Why it appears so hard to change career

If you look around you, you will get the impression that career change at any age is bloody difficult! 

Some suggest that natural human behaviour just gets in the way e.g. the fear of change (Read my article on how career change is experienced in our brains) or unwillingness to make the necessary sacrifices or simply being unprepared for the degree of change that is required to pivot into a career.  

But it is more than that.  Here’s how conventional wisdom about career change suggests you go about it.

 “Career Leaping” - the Conventional Wisdom on how to change career (Plan & Implement) :

  1. Be clear and sure about what it is that you really want to do.
  2. Identify roles or fields in which your passions can be linked with your skills and experience.
  3. Seek out advice from those you know well and those who know your new chosen market well.
  4. Implement resulting action steps.

 Never one for sitting on the fence, when asked my opinion on this mode of career change I usually whisper-shout… “WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!”  Here’s why…

According to the conventional wisdom, successful change is a one-chance saloon.  Apparently, you should only make a career change when you know exactly where you are heading.  WRONG AGAIN. If you follow this advice, you are in danger of staying exactly where you are for a very long time…possibly forever!

 Problems with the “Career Leaping” Conventional (Plan and Implement) Career Change model:

1. Clarity:   

  • Most people I meet are not clear about what they want to do with the rest of their career even though they’ve often spent a long time thinking about it.  They can easily tell me what they want to escape from (mind-numbing corporate politics; feeling shrunk-to-fit; under-challenging work; over-requirement to be away from home; futureless internal career vistas; lack of learning opportunities; over-cautious decision-making or organisational short-termism.)  
  • When I ask what it is they do want from their work – they never have a clear answer

2. Link passion with skills:

  • I don’t trust psychological profiles for career change.  All psychological profiles which are commonly used in career coaching are flawed but can give general insights to those who have lost a connection with themselves or have been stuck in an identity for so long they can’t imagine getting beyond it.  Starting point? Yes, but very broad brush.
  • Re-designing your working identity is a must before any change takes place. It frees up creative energy to change career.  Our working identity can be tied up in status, our income, our life-style, our ego, our parenting and the way we were parented. This takes time, reflection, pulling apart and putting back together over time.  This isn’t included in the Plan & Implement model.
  • “Passion” is my least favourite word to use in career change discussions as it more often than not leads us down a fantasy passion path.  To risk everything on something called "passion" is at best...risky.
Follow your passion.png

3. Seeing advice from people you know and those who know your new chosen industry/field: 

  • People already known to you are invested in you staying in the same spot.   Your partner wants you to be happy but needs to feel secure; your favourite head-hunters are tied to your past in a way that is unhelpful for a career change.  Your colleagues and mentors lack the investment in you as a human to do anything radical with their opinion of you.
  •  The individuals who know you best, are less likely to be able to imagine you with a    completely different working identity and can become more of a hindrance than a help.
  •  You need a new tribe to change career.

4.   Implement resulting actions

  • Banish the idea of linear career. We need to let go of that linear idea of career steps leading to somewhere very specific that we had planned earlier and making pre-judgements on how it will feel when we get there. 
  • Single leaps can be lucky.  But they are more likely to fail or go nowhere.
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A different method of career change – Experiment, Analyse and Refine

  • Experimentation = Action before knowing the answer. 

Rather than leaping into a new career, I believe the only way to know whether your potential career change is the right one is to conduct a whole range of mini-experiments.   This is the only way to evaluate whether a certain change could be right.   Not quite trial and error…rather experiment, analyse and refine. 

By doing a whole range of experiments you open doors that were never open to you before to see if the draught bowls you over.  You edge open doors that were ajar in your mind and then see how it feels with the wind in your face.  You push against some ugly doors to sometimes discover the most beautiful possibilities behind. The limits placed on your experiments provide the only limitations for your future career.   (LINK TO DOORS)

BUT THAT TAKES BRAVERY AND TIME.  

I feel so strongly about this experimentation stage that I have built an extra 3 months into my "The Big Re-think" programme to support individuals through the sheer volume of experiments that need to happen to ensure a successful transition.  Done slowly this experimentation phase could take 3 years but very few of my clients have 3 years to spend – we narrow down the initial experimentation phase to a 3-month period following a 3-month discovery process.  That way the experiments are not random. They are focussed.   They play on the SuperPowers of the individual and they feel exciting.

Single leaps can be lucky.  But they are more likely to bring us back to the same starting point and crucially, they make us feel like a failure.  That’s why you hear stories of people who made a leap and within a short time frame are back in their safe old job.  They were following the Plan and Implement model.

 It’s not perfect - Downsides of the Experiment, Analyse and Refine model of career change

·         A longer, less linear transition process can sometimes leave you feeling that you are not moving fast enough.  But smaller steps combined with quicker analysis after each experiment allows for a richer, more developed and realistic idea of the future work identity to emerge. 

·         The Experiment and Learn technique of career change is challenging and requires resisting the pull of the familiar.

·         It requires tenacity to lift and shift experiments and point them in a different direction, at a different audience or to tweek the experiments.

·         Did I mention that it requires bravery?  But really, how brave is it doing a few little experiments on the side of your real job (that doesn’t fit anymore)?

·         The experiment stage is front loaded – you can’t sit behind a screen and do some lovely, easy research.  You must do stuff.  Make stuff.  Write stuff. Try stuff.

·         You need your brain to be turned on to analyse.

·         You need energy to do the experiments but if you are using your SuperPowers you’ll be surprised by how energising it can be.

·         You very often need someone to have your back, pick up the pieces, re-point to after each experiment, challenge your thought processes until they broaden for themselves, re-frame your imposter syndrome, tone down your perfectionism.

If you don’t test your dreams they remain just that – or even worse, they could end up as pipe dreams.  

Experiments are the only way to test your dreams. Their advantage lies in their small scale, their ability to be squeeze in around your current work and their lack of large-scale risk.

Whilst trigger events are usually pretty horrific when you are going through them, they can become the beginning of a completely new career story - or life story if you want to think bigger.  If you are interested in this idea, it might be worth reading Pamela Slim’s Body of Work. 

Discovering work that fits and understanding why takes time and effort, but it also requires a methodology to discover if you have the skill to make it a reality.  My methodology is called “The Big Re-think” programme.

Planning for the perfect leap is more likely to leave you staying where you are today.   Experimenting and learning, taking action in the form of mini-experiments, analysing the results and refining new experiments very likely to find you in a much better place. 

 How ready are you for action?  

 

 

Reached your mid-life career tipping point yet? What is it and what to do if you see it coming?

Did I drive my career into a rut overnight? Hell no! It happened slowly over a couple of years of low-level dissatisfaction. Like a dripping tap. I don’t really remember when it started but I certainly remember the point at which I decided that enough was enough…the point at which I’d reached my mid-life career tipping point.

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Did I drive my career into a rut overnight? Hell no! It happened slowly over a couple of years of low-level dissatisfaction. Like a dripping tap. I don’t really remember when it started but I certainly remember the point at which I decided that enough was enough…the point at which I’d reached my mid-life career tipping point

A personal story that fills me with shame

It was on a cold Tuesday evening a few years ago after my 42nd birthday (a lady never reveals her true age).  I’d done the commute to London on the early train leaving home the moment our lovely nanny arrived. 11 hours later on returning home, I ushered my young daughters upstairs to bed immediately, speed-read a story, speed-sung a lullaby and ended up ordering them to go to sleep because “Mummy has an important call to do now!”  They didn’t complain but did everything in their power to make me happy. My shoulders have slumped just remembering it. What was that important phone call? I was interviewing a Finance Director for a UK -wide search which I was leading in my head-hunting role. 

We all have crap days. But I wish I could say that it was a rare occurrence but it happened on a regular basis.  I experienced working mother guilt leaving the office earlier than others and needed to prove to myself (more than to anyone else) that I was working hard enough by working in the evenings.  As it turned out, that particular FD was perfect for the role. I, on the other hand, didn’t feel anywhere near perfect. I had priorities questions in life. I had inspiration questions at work.  I had work fulfilment questions. And I had begun to have life fulfilment questions. That Tuesday was the day I reached my own personal tipping point.  

A "Tipping point" and why it's relevant to mid-life careers

Malcolm Gladwell in his book called “The Tipping Point” describes the phenomenon as “the moment of critical mass, the threshold, the boiling point”.  He uses it to describe the point at which an idea, trend or social behaviour crosses a threshold, tips and spreads like wildfire.    I see the career change tipping point in a similar way. A career change tipping point occurs when the wealth of evidence to make a change outweighs the mass of evidence to stay in the same role, career or profession full-time.    

After interviewing over 50 successful career changers in their 40s and 50s, one of the first patterns I noted was that they all reached a tipping point in their previous careers where making a decision on priorities was required.  There was almost always a tipping point at which their work became so unsatisfying and made them so unhappy that they felt compelled to do something about it.   Some of the quick thinkers who had begun their thinking process a little earlier described their tipping point as the point at which their new idea became so compelling that they simply felt compelled to change direction. Either way, they all hit a mid-life career tipping point.  

How doing unfulfilling work impacts us all differently.

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Being in a career rut can feel like...

a slowly-dripping tap.

When you feel stuck in a career that isn’t fulfilling, it ever-so-gently ebbs the joy out of your working existence like a slowly-dripping tap. Drip. Drip. Drip. 

-       Some people can zone out from the low level annoyance of a career rut’s dripping tap and continue to do good work without thinking too far ahead and live for holidays and weekends.  Drip. Drip. Drip.

-       Some people find a way to quickly turn off the annoying tap and either change jobs within a company, move to a new company or re-train – this occurs more often during the first ten years of their careers.   Once your career has been established, your life has often been established at a similar rate. This makes mid-life a harder time to turn off the annoying tap without material consequences.

-       For others, the annoying drip becomes ever so slowly louder and ever so slowly more powerful over years - while we put our career happiness on the back burner to prioritise paying mortgages, nursery/school fees and the family holidays (needed to recover and give us the energy to go back to face the nagging drip, drip, drip).

But drips taps and career ruts don’t fix themselves magically.  

Sometimes the “fixing” of career ruts and drips gets outsourced (re-structuring/re-structures/closure of divisions). This can have profound impacts on the individual who has been hearing the mid-life career drips for a while. Sometimes, someone else is brought in to solve the dripping tap problem (company take-overs/acquisitions/mergers).  It appears that feeling stuck and doing work that is unfulfilling to us is very obvious to those around us, even if we don’t admit it to ourselves.  That said, I’ve known many successful professionals who were exited from their company under a range of circumstances who (after the luxury of time and an adjustment of mind frame!) were quoted as saying “it was actually the biggest opportunity of my career.”  

But many of us keep ignoring the dripping tap until the message becomes deafening or until there is some sort of crisis in our personal lives which forces us to take action.  These crises, in my experience, often come in the form of redundancy, divorce, parental illness or personal health scares. My granny was right – a stitch in time saves 9 - meaning that if we could catch our careers before the tipping point and grab them by their throats before we hit rock bottom/break/get so stuck that it makes us feel sad, things might be a great deal less stressful.   If we could lift our heads up and understand that we can design and test a back-up plan for when the inevitable happens, before it happens, we’d be in a really strong position to crack on happily earning and doing more fulfilling work that suits us for as long as we want.   

So, what can you do when you feel that your mid-life career change is approaching tipping point?

I see no other way than to think deeply first, then take one action which breeds many more. Here’s what I recommend:

  1. Figure out what it is you want your work to do for you and why it isn’t doing it now

  2. Figure out what it is specifically that you do better than anyone else

  3. Using the information from Step 1 and Step 2, design possible ideas that would allow you to get paid for using your unique assets.

  4. Understand what’s stopping you & do one small experiment.

  5. Analyse that experiment in detail.

  6. Do another small experiment with tweaks from Step 5.

  7. Continue forever.

There is simplicity in re-designing your career to suit you and there appear to be lots of ways to do it.  But this is the way that I have found to be most successful.  I ask a great deal of the right types of questions and then ask clients to commit time and energy to do my “thinking exercises”.  If they do these, they will be 95% more successful at designing work that might be fulfilling, satisfying and (God forbid!) more fun than the career of the average individual in a career rut trying to ignore the dripping tap.

To get you started, I’ve published one of the early chapters of my up and coming book on patterns of successful mid-life career change.  I’ve called this chapter Dare to Hope – How it feels to be free from the trap of the wrong career.  You can download it from my website www.midlifeunstuck.com

The future of work in our 40s, 50s: The “Educate – Work – Retire” model is dead.

Dreaming of retiring from a job you don't love? Imagine loving what you do so much you can't imagine stopping.

Dreaming of retiring from a job you don't love? Imagine loving what you do so much you can't imagine stopping.

I worked in the same industry for just shy of 20 years.  Like many professionals who have invested a couple of decades in their career, I figured I was destined to stay in the same industry for the rest of my career.  But what happens when you start to feel stuck and that feeling won’t disappear even after a few years? 

Back then, I didn’t know I’d be working in a completely different industry, using some completely different skills and interacting with totally different people.  I didn’t know any of this until I made the decision to “not be in the same industry next year”.   I wish I had come across the attached report years ago and I might have understood how to begin to alleviate my “stuck” feelings more quickly and at very least I would not have felt like the only lonely lemon in the world of oranges.

The report is called “Shift – the Commission on Work, Workers and Technology” where leaders from the worlds of Technology, Business and Culture were asked to forecast what the world of work would look like in 10-20 years. Whilst it is US-centric, it has real implications globally.

Here is the over-riding message that you need to know from the report: The “Educate – Work – Retire” model is not yet dead but it’s certainly dying.  The linear career path that has been prevalent until now simply isn’t useful or relevant for the over 40s/50s any longer.  A more dynamic work/life path is forecast for over 40s/50s.   Not only are there other ways to work in your 40s and 50s, those other ways are definitely more flexible, can be more fun if designed well and are more likely to keep our demographic earning for as long as we want to.

 Here are some of the specific forecasts from the “Shift” report for the next 10-20 years:

1.      Education-work-then-retire model is very outdated.  

2.      Retirement to a yacht isn’t that fulfilling or possible for most individuals

3.      Many 50+ will delay retirement and/or work part-time as funding retirements (in the old sense of 20-30years with a fixed income) become risky and uncertain.

4.      Many over 50s will begin a second career for both financial and social reasons

5.      Older workers will represent a larger part of the part-time work-force – independent contracting, freelancing and consulting etc.

6.      Volunteering or working part-time for not-for-profit businesses (high level team leadership included) will be viewed more highly in status than net worth.

7.      As adults, we will be in and out of school, in and out of work, in and out of volunteering jobs, multiple sabbaticals and gap periods more often than ever before.

By God this excites me…but it would have frightened me 3 years ago staring down the barrel of one career in one industry for the rest of my working days.  The thought of retirement also doesn't excite me as I get so much satisfaction, self-esteem and self-worth from working – like many people.  

Whilst I do know a couple of individuals of my generation who are holding out for retirement, the majority have tapped into society’s feeling that “life is too short to keep your head down and bum up until we are 65 to start enjoying life”.   The sad truth is that many of us will have a serious illness before we are 65 so we need to somehow mix work with fun in a way that hasn’t been necessary/available before.  

SM Post We need to learn to mix work and pleasure more than ever before.png

 

I’ve made it my mission to try to mix work with fun by doing work that I mostly find fun but that isn’t the only way.  This report suggests that the money-making element of work will find us working until we are older than ever before BUT that those long work years may be inter-mingled with back-to-school gaps, career breaks and/or sabbaticals.  

Just on the street where I live I know one person who is on sabbatical for 6 months to invest time and energy into her husband’s fitness business, another who is ramping up artistic endeavours as she wants to reduce the physicality of her earlier career and yet another who has just launched his first photography business.  These individuals are in the experimental phases of their mid-life career changes but they definitely attempting to design work in a way that allows them to create their own financially secure, physically and emotionally free and fulfilling work.  In my opinion and the opinion of this report…the future workplace for 40 and 50 year olds on my street is exceedingly fluid…and exciting!   

 So if the "Educate - Work - Retire" model is dead or dying...what does the future workplace for individuals in their 40s and 50s on your street look like?

Neighbours.jpg

Changing career in midlife is just a series of experiments...easier said than done!

I'd have paid good money to be doing this rather than conducting my scary experiment - was it worth it?

I'd have paid good money to be doing this rather than conducting my scary experiment - was it worth it?

As you might expect, given my career choice, I have designed my business around one of my unique strengths which also gives me joy – helping people through a proven career un-sticking process specifically on a one-to-one basis.   The one-to-one element was no accident.  Not only does that format play to my strengths - I’m scared witless of presenting to groups!   But, I had hit a problem in my business… 

In October and November, I was fully booked with one-to-one clients fulfilling my mission to “eradicate unnecessary career unhappiness - one mid-lifer at a time”.   BUT, I realised that even if that situation were to continue forever, I was going to be 90 years old before I make a decent dent in the raft of mid-life professionals in UK who are seriously career stuck.  

So, I decided to conduct an experiment to test an idea – not an easy idea for me.  Not an idea that would allow me to stay in my comfort zone.  In fact, it was an idea that every bone in my body was resistant to – presenting my ideas on how to un-stick your career to a group. 

The test question: Would it be possible to teach a small group the basics of unsticking their careers in 2hrs in front of people they don’t know?

I asked for help from someone whose superpower means she can take embryonic ideas and make them real - Rebecca Moody.    Rebecca kindly helped me design a group workshop idea into an experiment from which attendees would walk away with both an understanding of the secret to career happiness and some practical tools to help them kick-start a DIY unsticking process.  

So, one evening a few weeks ago in the Zoo Café near Godalming (the funkiest commuter Café I have ever seen) Rebecca and I co-hosted the first MidlifeUnstuck “Unstick my Career” workshop.

How scared I felt conducting this experiment: 

As I bombed down the A3 the second after the babysitter arrived, I looked and felt like a loonie coaching myself aloud that this experiment was “brave not stupid” whilst almost vomiting into my lap with nerves and fighting back the “What the hell am I doing?” feelings seeping out of every pore.  I was undoubtedly afraid, feeling totally exposed and decidedly vulnerable.  This was very different to presenting to groups in my old career – everything I would be presenting would be my ideas, my research and my programmes.  Amongst other fatalistic mantras and plentiful swearing, this is the type of self-chat that was going on in my car:

  • “Why the hell did I agree to this when I knew I get nervous speaking in front of groups?”

  • “What if I couldn’t communicate my knowledge and ideas?”

  • “What if my introverted self - who prefers one-to-one communication - doesn’t allow me to speak in straight lines?”

  • “What if I didn’t look like a career change expert after years studying and working to try to become one?”

  • “What if I am publicly exposed as a fraud?”

  • “What if everyone cancelled at the last minute?”

  • “What if they were all horrible people (or other such less gentile words)?”

  • “What if they all stand up, walk out and ask for their money back?”

Essentially, I was party to endless fearful conversations led by my own brain, trying to get me to turn around, let the babysitter go home early and do something less scary instead (see sofa photo above).    It was bloody hard to keep driving towards (what I perceived to be) imminent failure.

Did I turn the car around and head back to my comfy sofa? 

Only in my dreams.  The shame of not doing what I ask my clients to do on a daily basis would have crushed me.  I did exactly what I advise all of my clients to do…I took one step outside of my comfort zone and analysed what happened.  

 

Incase you were wondering...this is what I look like pretending to be brave...

Incase you were wondering...this is what I look like pretending to be brave...

  • I stepped out of the car after doing my 2 minute power pose (from Amy Cuddy's tedtalk) in the surprisingly gigantic commuter train station in the middle of nowhere. Still alive.

  • I walked in the door of the Zoo Cafe. Still alive.

  • I pretended Rebecca my co-host and co-owner of the Zoo Café that my nerves were excitement. Still alive.

  • I noted Rebecca’s eye for design which had transformed the venue from funky commuter café offering trademarked Cups of Awesome to sparkly, inviting, candle-lit group cave. I smiled. Still very much alive. I might even breathed!

  • I said “Hello” to the first smiley, lovely career-stuck individual. Not only alive but I could feel my shoulders relax to half-mast.

  • I nearly bear-hugged that poor lady simply for turning up but when I got close, I could sense a little of her own personal nerves. I breathed. It was going to be ok. I had not thrown myself to the Lions. This was an experiment not a death sentence.

 

The “Experiment and analysis” phase is something I talk a great deal about with clients who are a fair way down the un-sticking path.  There often isn’t a big leap from one career to another but lots of testing of mini-ideas and noting how the world reacts.  That evening, I re-lived all the feelings I had had when I first started the business and crikey it was painful...very far from comfy.    These experiments and tests are outside our comfort zones…but that’s kind of the point. 

If you’re not stuck, you don’t need to try anything different.  BUT, I was vividly re-learning how trying something different can be bloody scary. 

As more people joined us and had a little glass of something awesome to take the edge off the cold evening, I kept breathing and “braved up”.  The experiment had begun.

Here’s what happened in my group experiment:

  • 6 absolutely wonderful, successful career mid-lifers walked through the doors. They hailed from music, media, advertising, IT and banking industries. They had totally different disciplines, different family situations, different health situations, different reasons for feeling stuck and different fears of being stuck forever. But they had something in common: they were all, by their own admissions, “stuck”.

  • After introductions, I talked a little about what being “career stuck” looks like from my research and then I dug even deeper and exposed myself as someone who had been horribly stuck three few years ago. I talked about my own brand of focused-grumpy at work and stressy-distracted at home for years and told them about the day when enough was enough.

  • We then discussed the very simple key to short-term career happiness – and some of the complexity behind that idea.

  • We then worked in pairs to discuss the top three things that stop mid-lifers taking control of their careers and top three things that mid-lifers feel when they do regain control.

  • I presented some of the findings from my upcoming mini book “Dare to Hope” which tells how it actually feels for a selection of midlife career changers before and after they changed their careers (sign up to my newsletter and I’ll send it to you when it’s finished).

  • We also uncovered the secret to longer term, sustainable career happiness.

  • Then we did a mini-super powers session which resulted in everyone leaving knowing how to find their own brilliance but needing time alone to think quietly.

  • Finally we ran through my Beginners Guide to Mid-life Career Change” (which you can download from my website).

So what? Here’s how one scary, vomit-inducing experiment has changed my business:

  • I am planning a whole range of these introductions to the “Secrets to career happiness/Career re-design” workshops across the Surrey in 2018 with a similar format. (Get in contact with me if you’d like to co-host one in your locality)

  • Based on feedback, I’m toying with the idea of breaking my programmes up into modules and offering each of these as group sessions.

  • I’ve pressed “go” on an idea I have been working on for a while - The design of my first ever 5 day MidlifeUnstuck Transformation Programme in Bordeaux. It is specifically aimed at mid-lifers who are stuck but need to get away from it all to think clearly and would enjoy long country walks, exercise classes on site and healthy food in luxurious surroundings. This is a collaboration with the marvellous bespoke retreat company Pure Retreats. The first two retreats of 2018 have already sold out there are spaces left for March. Check it out here

Test question result: Was it possible to teach a small group the basics of unsticking their careers in 2hrs in front of people they don't know?  

Yes.  My programmes last between 3-6 months so it would have been impossible to un-stick those individuals fully but I hadn't set the experiment up to fail.  What was possible was for me to connect with a larger group of people in their 40s and 50s in order to share insights on re-designing their careers and for them to learn the basics on how to start the in-sticking process at home.  I tried to cover a great deal in one short session and the openness to learning and interest in how to get started from the attendees blew me away.  For confidentiality reasons, I cannot name these brave, curious individuals who had had enough of banging their heads against brick walls.  But I am delighted that they came. 

Some of them, I hope, will go on to choose a coach to help them on a one-to-one basis.  Others may join some of the future group sessions and move forward over time.  Others may sit down over the following few weeks and work through the beginners guide to pinpoint what it is they want, what it is they are great at and what changes they could make to impact their career enjoyment positively. 

I don’t believe there are any other options because once you know there is a possible way out, you can’t choose to stay stuck any longer.

For me, this was a very worthwhile experiment that has had a profound impact on me and my business.  Whilst I was undoubtedly afraid, many good things have come from the experience. 

Was the experiment slick, perfectly presented and did everyone walk off in a cloud of career happiness?  Of course not, but it was priced accordingly.  That said, I changed the world more than if I had stayed at home on my comfy sofa that night! 

Dare to hope 3d cover.png

Dare to Hope is my new mini-book which has be carved out from my research interviews with 50+ interviews with successful mid-life career changers.  To get it emailed directly to you, sign up to my newsletter and it’ll be with you as soon as it is ready.

 

 

What’s stopping your career change in your 40s or 50s…How to reduce the risk surrounding career change

This week a client equated his feelings of being in the wrong career for years to having his soul-sucked out of his body by the “Dementors” from Harry Potter.  We laughed at the time but the image made a big impression on me.  

Wrong job vs wrong career

Being in the wrong job hurts.   It’s like a dull pain that only disappears when you change jobs.  It’s short-term.

Being in the wrong career, however, is a whole different kettle of fish.  It’s feels like a great weight is bearing down on your body, endlessly eking the joy out of your work AND often your life. 

Being in the wrong career feels like long-term pain and can manifests itself in illness, lack of sleep, lack of motivation to exercise, lowering of libido and a general lack-lustre feeling.

If that’s true, why do we accept it…for years?  

In one survey, 43% of the 45-54 age group wanted to change careers (London School of Business & Finance research).  It’s fairly easy to change careers when you are in your twenties. But once you have invested 15+ years in a career, it’s much more difficult.    

Midlife is a natural time to reflect and evaluate what exactly we want from a career and to decide if we’re prepared to do what is required to get what we want.  

I know so many midlifers who are unhappy in their careers but can’t seem to figure out what to do to change their situations.  It might be useful to know that you are not alone in thinking career change is difficult.  

Top 10 reasons successful mid-lifers give to stay in careers that don’t suit them anymore:

1.      “I’ll never be able to earn the same salary again.”

2.      “I’ll have to take a low-paying job to begin with and I’m too old to start at the bottom.”

3.      “I’ve only ever done X.” (insert current career)

4.      “My partner/friends/colleagues would think I was having a midlife crisis.”

5.      “No-one would employ me to do something different.”

6.      “I don’t know what I’d do, if I didn’t do this.”

7.      “I enjoy a great deal of flexibility and autonomy. I doubt I’d get that in another job.”

8.      “It’ll take me another 20 years to become good at something.”

9.      “I work part-time and no other employer will let me.”

10.   “If I changed now, I would waste the huge investment in my current career.”

I’d like to add a final one which no one has ever said to me directly but it is a very common reason to stay in a career which is wrong – “It’s easier to stay where I am.”  But that is a whole different story for another time. 

Let’s be honest…we’re talking about FEAR

All of the above reasons to stay in a career that no longer fits have their basis in fear.   Fear has a particularly negative impact on the brain.

Psychologists and biologists believe that the primitive “flight-fight-freeze” response to danger is alive in us all and is not limited to dangerous physical situations but to situations where there is perceived risk.  

To the human brain, changing careers when you have life responsibilities such as a mortgage to pay or a family to support feels risky (at best) and dangerous (at worst). 

brain sees career change as dangerous..png

What happens to the brain when it thinks you are in physical danger or at risk? 

The brain shuts down some of its operations to allow the critical ones to continue.  This results in a paired-down version of you – where optimism disappears, the risk of something awful happening is intensified and the creative, problem-solving you is turned off (or at least turned down).  

In other words, you dive into risk-scanning mode where you are constantly scan the environment for things that could be dangerous or risky – thereby highlighting only the risks and pitfalls of changing career (see the above list).

Most of us know at least one midlifer who is unhappy in their career and whilst they have talked about career change for some time, they can’t seem to figure out what to do next.   This “flight-fight-freeze” response to danger might be apparent in their behaviour. 

Behaviours (conscious and unconscious) which often indicate that someone is in the wrong career:

  • Flight:

Resigning without a plan; unexplained illnesses; more sick leave days than ever before in career; attempting to get signed off on stress leave; intensive holiday planning (beyond their normal holiday excitement); impulsive behaviour; asking headhunters to “get me out of here”; praying for redundancy to happen; buying business domain names for future businesses; spending rainy day savings on random business ideas that don’t appear to be well-thought out.

  • Fight:

Applying for lots of jobs that seem very similar to their current job; applying for any job that is not their current job; bad-mouthing their current boss far and wide in an attempt to let other divisions know that they are open to new opportunities; digging deep to work harder in the belief that this tough period will end magically with a happy conclusion.

  • Freeze:

Day-dreaming of handing in a resignation letter; waiting until they have a million dollar idea for their future business while getting less and less effective at your day job; wishing and hoping that someone will email them with a new job via www.linkedin.com tomorrow morning; ignoring Sunday night blues; ignoring the fact that their role is physically and mentally draining the life out of them;  attempting to convince themselves that their current career is “not that bad” – but the thought of doing it for another year (never mind decade) makes them feel ill.

How to reduce the “flight-fight-freeze” reactions in your brain?

1.      Stop trying to focus on the elusive end point. 

Instead focus on Step 1 by asking yourself “which specific bits of my current career do I really enjoy doing?” Write a list.  Imagine doing lots more of those tasks on a daily basis.  

2.      Start some easy but real research.

Do you know anyone who has changed careers successfully – even if they haven’t made a radical change?  Talk to them.  Talk to friends, friends of friends, family members or even look up celebrities who have changed careers.  How did they do it?  Ask every single person in your network if they know anyone who has changed their career and loves their new career.  Then call them up and ask them why they love their career choice. (If you really can’t find anyone, contact me and I’ll connect you to someone who loves their new career – I am in the process of interviewing 100 of them for my first book).

3.      Don’t assume you need a total and utter career change to feel more fulfilled. 

Remember your last good day at work and write down why it was better than recent days, weeks, months or years.  

4.      Open your mind to the idea that it is possible to earn at least the same salary as you currently earn by doing something that you are GREAT at.  

Have a detailed look at your finances understand the minimum viable income you would require in the short-term.  What savings/assets could you liquidate to have a financial cushion to make sitting in your new job/career a little easier in the early days.  

5.      Read real case studies or autobiographies of individuals who have changed careers. 

I’ve made it ridiculously easy for you - check out my “Jam-makers” career change stories for an ever-growing list of mid-lifers who are making their 40s, 50s and 60s the jam years of their careers.

Once you have demonstrated to your brain why changing career has not been at all dangerous for a whole range of people throughout the globe (and infact has enabled them to live much more fulfilling and wealthier lives), your brain will begin to allow you the optimism (and realism) to imagine how changing career might not be actually dangerous for you

It might actually liberate you!

C

Other related articles:

If you’re interested in being the first to read any new articles and get how-to strategies for your own career change twice a month direct to your inbox, sign up to my “You’re not too old and it’s not too late” newsletter

Top 5 regrets of the dying…No 2 will impact your mid-life career today

Bronnie Ware, a Sydney-based, palliative care nurse spent 8 years caring for individuals at the end of their lives and wrote an article about her learnings during that period of her career. She summarised the end-of-life wisdom offered by her patients into the 5 points below.  

Her article was picked up by the global media and the full story has been crafted into a book which transformed Bronnie’s career and at the same time has influenced the lives of many, including mine.    

My only focus today is on No2 but if you’d like to read the article in full – here’s the link http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bronnie-ware/top-5-regrets-of-the-dyin_b_1220965.html.

It surprised me that EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THE MEN she had interviewed in the last 3-12 weeks of their lives expressed the following regret: “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.”    These men were often octogenarians who had spent their lives as the sole bread-winner for their family.  

Of course, the world for mid-lifers has changed greatly.  Mid-life women today have infinitely more choice about their careers than the previous generation.  That said,  I wonder when we mid-lifers are nearing the end of our lives whether “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard” will remain one of our top-listed end-of-life regrets?

Look, there is nothing wrong with working hard.   In fact, some of us are just built to work hard - either led by either our personality type or by the training offered by our baby-boomer parents.   I don’t know about you but I certainly get a great deal of personal satisfaction out of working hard, ESPECIALLY when I am working hard at something I love doing.   

When we work hard at something we love doing, or work hard at something that we are great at, it simply doesn’t drain the life out of us the way that working hard on something we either don't enjoy or are not that great at does.   We feel more fulfilled.  We occasionally feel exhilarated and feel like we could keep going for hours.  We feel more youthful and energised.  ALSO there is more of us left over at the end of the day for the people we love in our lives who probably kind of…would like to see us feeling happier.  Win, win.    

dying blossom

Working hard at something you don’t love or something that you are not great at for years or even decades appears to me to be such a waste of a life.

I have very high hopes that my fellow mid-lifers don’t feel as trapped in our “jobs” as the previous generation who had fewer career choices, less opportunities to re-train and less opportunities to share a mortgage with their partner.   

However, it appears that successful professional careers (here in UK at least) require 8-12 hour work days plus lengthy commutes.  If all of us mid-lifers worked hard for 8-12 hours a day doing something we simply loved/were great at, we’d all have these wildly interesting careers and perhaps we’d even be transforming the world during our work day…wouldn’t we?

As it happens, many of the patients in Bronnie’s experience also worked hard for 8-12 hours a day for 40+ years…but still wished they hadn’t.   They may not have had a choice…but we do.  

If you are working in a career that is draining the life out of your life, or if you are doing something that you don’t love and want to start re-designing the second half of your career, have a look at www.midlifeunstuck.com/how-i-work/ or drop me an email at lucia@midlifeunstuck.com to set up a time to speak confidentially. 

If you’re not quite ready but would like access to a growing body of free resources including articles, book recommendations and an up-and-coming selection of client transformation stories, signup to my newsletter at www.midlifeunstuck.com/coaching-work/.

Love Fridays? Hate Sunday night blues? The key to mid-life career happiness...

Happy jump png

If you are reading this you are likely to be a mid-lifer (or my slightly deluded dad who has been known to call people “elderly” when they are exactly the same age as he is).  

You are likely to have been earning a crust for roughly 20-30 years.  You’ve been around a few workplaces and seen the good, the bad and the ugly of work life.   If you are anything like me, you might also to be sensing a slight down-turn in the perfect functioning of a few body parts - just this week I visited a physio, a podiatrist and with my GP for 3 separate body malfunctions which I am convinced can be attributed to my mid-life status.   

Whatever your gender, the average mid-lifer often spends more time avoiding accidental glimpses of their (gracefully?) aging body rather than throwing admiring glances in the bedroom mirror.    More mid-lifers are responding to the inevitable onslaught of grey hairs and their naturally slowing metabolism by taking up a new sport. 

According to Sport England, the age-group with the strongest growth in sports participation over the last decade is 45-54year olds, with an impressive 25% increase over the last ten years.  More specifically, we are taking to lyra-cladding our aging bodies to still the passage of time.  33% of participants in the London Triathlon last year were in the 40years+ age group in comparison to 25% just five years ago.

Whatever your age, if you are lucky enough to still have your parents in your life, you might also be involved with the medical problems associated with the even more rapid aging process experienced by late-lifers.   

It’s complex being a mid-lifer.

One of the simple elements of mid-life should be eking out a little happiness from your work life…but it’s not, is it?  

We, as human beings, don’t appear to be very good at finding happiness at work.  Why not?

These appear to be the most common reasons offered by the mid-lifers I come across for their inability to lock down their own happiness at work:

1.     proximity to the problem

2.    too little time

3.    lack of perspective

4.    persistent and recurring energy depletion from performing work that drains us

5.    fear of change

6.    financial situation concerns

7.    worry about loss of security and stability

8.    no idea how to begin to change the situation

Sometimes we resign ourselves to the (false) idea that there’s nothing we can do about it – apparently “No one really LOVES their job anyway”.     

Let me tell you a well-kept secret:  Some people really, really LOVE THEIR WORK.  But, these people only communicate this openly when they are with other people who also REALLY LOVE THEIR WORK.   

These are good people.  They have no wish to make less fortunate individuals feel bad or open a can of worms that they don’t have the skill/time/inclination to re-pack.  

But, how do they instinctively recognise that we are not a member of their secret HAPPY AT WORK CLUB?  This is a work-in-progress from a www.midlifeunstuck.com research perspective.   But, it appears to have something to do with the stress we hold in our faces and bodies when we/someone else around us talk about work.     

These lesser-spotted lovers-of-their-work avoid childishly prodding you with ‘Na Na Na Na Na…I’m enjoying my job more than you’re enjoying yours!”   Unless, of course, they are sadists who get kicks out of the misfortune of others.   

These lovers-of-their-work are, of course, not happy at work all the time (happiness is not a life-time state but an accumulation of moments.) But, they enjoy many, many more of these moments than the average Joe/Jolene.

How do they become part of this secret lovers-of-their-work club?

First of all, the easy bit – they start with a “decent career” that they don’t hate.   Here are, what I believe to be, the four components of a decent career.

1.    Satisfying a human need to help people to do something that you believe to be valuable. This one is pretty obvious but here are some examples from my clients: 

  • helping sell higher quality wine to people who love wine but don’t have a big budget;

  • helping companies make better decisions by having great future-focussed financial information;

  • helping customers design great advertisements to sell more of their products;

  • helping making all employees within our business create long-term relationships with customers;

  • helping people improve their fitness to enable their lives to be more fun;

  • helping banks keep their systems operational so that 1000s of people get paid;

  • helping clients design their perfect building/extension to allow them to live happier lives;

  • helping charities to raise funds to enable more and better assistance to be offered to those in need;

  • helping parents to build resilience in their children to take the stress out of life transitions.

 

2.    Basic life needs can be satisfied

  • enough money to cover mortgage and life;

  • a commute that doesn’t make you want to pull your eyelashes out one by one over many hours

  • in general, working the hours of work that you signed up to - even if sometimes it is a bit crazy

  • a safe working environment – not just hard-hat wearing but emotion safety from excessive and prolonged stress

 

3.    Satisfactory freedom to work how you like to work. I don’t mean you like to get paid a fortune for doing a few hours work.  This one is more to do with personality style and values matching your work (the majority of the time).

  • if you are an introvert that you have time to think before needing to perform/give your opinion;

  • if you hate details that you are not required to fine-tune everything in your work life, all of the time;

  • if you like to do the right thing that your work allows you to operate within your own moral compass guidelines;

  • if you thrive on creativity that there is enough requirement/time available to satisfy that itch;

  • if you enjoy managing a team that you have time and space to do just that in your own style;

  • if you have children whom you like to see regularly, you have the flexibility to satisfy that parental need.

 

4.    Some regular feedback to allow you to feel satisfied that you are doing a good job.

Rarely do people LOVE THEIR WORK from a deep, dark, lonely cave – emotionally or physically.  To feel satisfied at work, we humans require some feedback on how we are doing e.g.

  • linked-in “likes” to an article you wrote;

  • a pat on the back from your boss;

  • winning a significant contract;

  • verbal praise for doing something specific really well;

  • an informal recommendation to speak to you about something you are great at;

  • a bloody good appraisal; and of course...

  • let’s not forget…a decent bonus.

The more detail-focussed of you might notice the multiple use of the words “satisfied/satisfaction” in the above components of a “decent career”.

Let me be clear, ticking all 4 boxes above will NOT lead to “career happiness” but it usually leads to “career satisfaction”.  

If this is your first time reading any of my articles, I’ll let you know now that “career satisfaction” isn’t a driver for me.  I aim a great deal higher.   

So how can you raise the bar to focus on finding “career happiness”? 

The absolute key lies in finding your superpowers, understanding what is stopping you from using more of your superpowers at work and designing possible career options to do just that.   That’s it. That’s the secret behind my work.  It’s as easy as that.

So, why don’t we all know what our superpowers are?

It's hard work searching for your superpowers.

It's hard work searching for your superpowers.

 

We do…but most people don't think about our career in this way.  It requires some deep searching.  It takes a little time and a giant dose of honesty which is difficult to do by yourself.  It's incredibly possible though.  

Soon, I’ll give you a step-by-step approach to how to find your superpowers for yourself.  

If you can’t wait and would like to get started immediately on uncovering your personal and unique superpowers to unstick your career, drop me an email at lucia@midlifeunstuck.com.  If you are not quite ready but want access to a growing body of free resources including articles, book recommendations and an up-and-coming selection of client transformation stories, signup to my newsletter at www.midlifeunstuck.com.